I was recently embroiled in a debate on social media about the importance of home-baked sugary treats as a necessity for a grammar school party to be considered “fun”, where group of parents took it upon themselves to petition the school board to revoke the district-wide ban on food treats for school parties.  They claimed that their children deserved to have fun at the school like it was when they were kids.  They claimed school celebrations with food were an important part of childhood.  They claimed that a pen that blows bubbles can never be an equivalent treat compared to pink-frosted cupcakes.  They claimed that Halloween parties weren’t fun unless students could bring weapons or paint their faces in blood.  They claimed that a valentine for every student defeated the purpose of choosing a valentine.

The ban exists due to the increasing number of students (and adults) who suffer from food allergies including peanuts and gluten.  For some of these children, the allergies are severe enough to be life-threatening; for some,  it isn’t even a matter of ingesting the allergen:  if they are near it or touch a space that the allergen touched they can be affected.  Most schools now have “peanut free” lunch tables to accommodate students.  Staff takes extra care to clean these spaces.  Some schools have banned certain foods school wide.  I read of one case where a student was hospitalized after exposure because he put his hand on the bathroom stall where a student who had eaten a PB&J for lunch had touched before him.  He went into anaphylactic shock and was hospitalized for a week.

Schools, especially Public Schools, need to be safe for children.  Inclusive.  In addition to all the other factors we consider when addressing school safety — bullying, violence, building security, handicap access, cleanliness, vaccines — we must also consider food allergies.  So when these parents came forward with a petition (!) to ban the ban, I couldn’t believe my eyes.  The petition made claims that the children with allergies knew what they were allowed to eat, and their moms could just provide safe treats for that child.  Every child deserves the party.  No child deserves to be excluded:  “Here, Timmy, sit over here in this antiseptic corner and enjoy your plain rice cake while the rest of the children have funfetti cupcakes and brownies and monster cookies”.  Seriously?  Their petition had over 500 signatures!  Are we, as a culture, completely devoid of compassion?  Empathy?  Thankfully, the School Board and PTA stood up for the children and voted against the measure.  

Parents, if you want your children to have more fun at school and opportunities for special events, get involved.  Work with your PTA and your classroom teachers to find ways to help.  There are calendars that list Holidays for Every Day.  Offer to plan a special class event with your child’s teacher to celebrate one (talk-like-a-pirate-day is a personal favorite).  Plan (and provide supplies for) games and art projects and activities that will give the children an opportunity to celebrate and be creative and have a break from school work and test prep.  The teachers will also appreciate the break in the routine, as long as you aren’t creating more work for them.  During my years as a class party mom, we had students tie-dye their own t-shirts for the upcoming school field day; brought in a 100 collections of 100 items for students to celebrate the 100th day of school; dressed like your favorite character for Dr. Seuss Day (Read Across America Day); allowed students to write messages on the sidewalk coming into school for Valentine’s Day; gave each student a sapling to plant for Arbor Day.  Bed Head Day.  Mismatched Socks.  Pink Out.  Xbox Tournament.  Movie Day.  Book swap.  One year a local farmer donated fertilized eggs for a classroom to hatch and raise baby chickens.  Be creative.  Here’s the thing:  kids don’t know the difference — if the party is fun, they won’t miss the cupcake.